Candy Suicide

I've been eating way more of the kids' Halloween candy than I should. I'm trying to lose weight, for goodness' sake. Why do they throw all these FOOD holidays at us right when it gets so bloody cold outside that all I want to do is stay inside and nibble all day? It's just mean and inconsiderate. They don't have any sort of salad or crisp veggie holidays. No, it's got to be holidays were we focus first on candy (Halloween); then on turkey, potatoes & gravy, and PIE (Thanksgiving); then there's more candy, cakes, and cookies, cookies, COOKIES (Christmas)! Top it off with New Year's, where I'm tempted to drink myself into oblivion--those empty calories in booze are such a waste, and then I'm punished with a hangover?!? Forget it!

I've got to make a change. I had placed all of the girls' candy into a gallon Ziploc bag (which it filled, even after a week of all of us--minus Donovan--snarking away at it every chance we get), with the intention of hiding it somewhere, so it's out of my sight. The girls can still eat it, I just don't want it sitting out anymore. However, I did have to pull out a few pieces that I know the girls won't eat: Twizzlers, Butterfingers, Snickers, Baby Ruths, etc. Those, I hid in a different spot. And I ask myself, why? I mean, it's not like I won't know where THOSE are! Why bother hiding them? In fact, why don't I just eat them right now? In FACT, why don't I just eat it ALL right now! Just open the hatch and dump ALL of the candy in, barely take time to even chew it. Eat all of the stuff in one sitting, so that I get so completely sick, barf my guts out, and then I'll never want to touch a single piece of candy again. It's the perfect plan! Of course, I may die doing it, but is Candy Suicide such a bad way to go?